Headline Oct 20, 2015/ ''' THE IDEAL CHEAT : OOOPS! '''

''' THE IDEAL CHEAT : OOOPS! '''

AT THE HEART OF life and existence, lies an unexpected  *treasure*  of hydra worms :  Cheats and Cheating. To name just two.

The story of Cheats and Cheating, as wise may confess to you someday, is one of temporary, -fleeting swift success, and long, long horrible decay and  decline. So having said that, now read on this truth....  from a paid academic ghostwriter.  

I do a lot of work for seminary students. I like seminary students. They seem so blissfully unaware of the inherent contradiction in paying somebody to help them cheat in courses-

That are largely about walking in the   light of God   and providing an ethical model for others to follow. I have been commissioned to write many a passionate condemnation of America's moral decay as exemplified by abortion, gay marriage or the teaching of evolution.

All in all, we may presume that clerical authorities see these as a greater threat than the plagiarism committed by the future frocked.

With respect to America's nurses, fear not. Our lives are in capable hands  -just hands that can't write a report. Nursing students account for one of my company's biggest customer bases. 

I've written case-management plans, reports on nursing ethics, and essays on why nurse-practitioners are lighting the way to the future of medicine. I've even written pharmaceutical-treatment courses for patients who I hope were hypothetical. 

*I, who have no name, no opinions, and no style, have written so many papers, including legal briefs, military strategy assessments, poems, lab reports, and, yes, even papers on academic integrity, that it's hard to determine which course of study is most infested with cheating*.

But I'd say education is the worst. I've written papers for students in elementary-education programmes and lesson plans for aspiring high school teachers. I've written essays for those studying to become a school administrators and theses for those on course to become principals.

In the enormous conspiracy that is  student  cheating, the frontline intelligence community is infiltrated by double agents. 

*[Future educators of America, I know who you are]*

As the deadline for the business ethics paper approaches, I think about what's ahead of me. Whenever, I take on an assignment this large, my body says : Are you sure you want to do this again You know that for the 48 hours you dedicate to writing this paper, you will cease all human functions but typing-

You will Google until the term has lost all meaning, and you will drink enough coffee to fuel a revolution in a small Central American country.

But then there's the money, the sense that I must capitalise on opportunity, and even a bit of thrill in seeing whether I can do it.

And I can, It's not implausible to write a  75-page paper in two days. It's just miserable. When I get cranking, I can churn out  four or five pages an hour. First I lay out the sections of an assignment   -introduction, problem statement, methodology, literature review, findings, conclusion. Then I start Googling.

I haven't been to library once since I started doing this job. Amazon is quite generous about free samples. If I can find a single page from a particular text, I can cobble that into a report, deducing what I don't know from customer reviews and publisher blurbs.

Google Scholar is a great source, providing the abstract of nearly any journal article. And of course, there's Wikipedia, which is often my first stop. Naturally, one must verify such material, but I've taken hundreds of crash courses this way.

After I've gathered my sources, I pull out usable quotes, cite them, and distribute them among the sections of the assignment. Just give me one phrase of quotable text, and I'll produce two pages of ponderous explanation. I can say in ten pages what most people could say in a paragraph.

I've also got a mental library of stock academic phrases : ''A close consideration of the events which occurred in ..........during the...................demonstrate that .........had entered into a phase of widespread cultural, social, and economic change that would define.........for decades to come.''

Fill in the blanks using words provided by the professor in the instructions.

How good is the product? That depends    -on the day, my mood, how many other assignments I am working on. I don't ever edit my assignments. That way I get fewer requests from customers to ''dumb it down.''

I've actually had customers thank me for being clever enough to insert typos. ''Nice touch,'' they'll say....................

''Nice Touch!''

The Honour and Serving of the ''Operational Research'' on Students Ecosystem continue. Thank you for reading, and maybe learning. Do share forward.

With respectful dedication to the Students, Parents, Professors and Teachers of the world. See Ya all on !WOW!  -the World Students Society Computers-Internet-Wireless:

''' Dammed If You Do '''

Good Night and God Bless

SAM Daily Times - the Voice of the Voiceless